What is domestic violence?
If you are suffering any kind of abuse within the family, from a partner or an ex-partner this is called domestic violence. Domestic violence includes a range of abusive behaviours to include:
These types of behaviours can be by more than one person.
If you are at risk there is help out there so please dial 999 if you are in immediate danger.
If you are living in fear and engulfed in the secrecy sometimes involved in domestic violence, you are not alone. If you need support and someone to talk to, you can explore your own exit strategy with someone at the Hillingdon Women's Centre or telephone us on 01895 259578.
The Hillingdon Women Centre will be here to listen and support you emotionally. To: explore your options, plan how to keep yourself safe and where you might be able to find a safe space away from the violence, you don’t have to suffer in silence. The decision to stay or to leave is your choice but we can help you to explore your options. Our professional legal team can help you explore your legal rights and what you might be able to do legally to stop the violence.
Legal Advice: Mondays 6pm to 7.15pm (drop-in) Tuesdays 9.30am-11.00am, Wednesdays 2pm to 3.15pm, Thursdays 9.30-11.30am by appointment
In 90% of reported domestic violence incidents, children have either been present in the same or a nearby room, and according to the Department of Health, at least 750,00 children a year witness DV. Children who witness, intervene or hear incidents are affected in many ways, even after a short time.
Short term affects include:
Older children may start to use alcohol or drugs, begin to self-harm or develop an eating disorder.
Long term affects
The longer children are exposed to violence, the more severe the affects on them can be. Long term effects can include:
Children who witness DV are being emotionally abused, and is recognised as 'significant harm' in recent legislation.
You may also get support and information by talking to someone in confidence by contacting the
Hillingdon Independent Domestic Violence Advocacy Service (IDVA) for crisis support. Tel: 020 8246 1745
If you need to leave home in an emergency whether you have children or not and you need a safe place to stay whilst you sort your situation, you can request accommodation in a refuge space by contacting The National Domestic Violence Helpline on: 0808 2000 247
Hillingdon Women’s Centre is an independent panel member of the Multi Agency Risk Assessment Conference (MARAC). MARAC is an information sharing body that is committed to reducing domestic violence and related crimes in the community. We work with MARAC to help protect the rights of women and children who are entitled to a life free from domestic violence. The aim of our involvement is to help ensure that women and their children are safe, and perpetrators, through legal channels are: made aware of their unacceptable behaviour and the justice systems zero tolerance of domestic violence in the community.
To do list in case you need to leave home:
These are the things you will need to take with you if you have to leave home in an emergency. Keep them in a safe place, preferably with a trusted relative or friend who will not give information to your abuser.
This is a very comprehensive list; you may not have, or need, all the things listed.
Do not delay leaving home if you do not have them if you are in any danger.
If you have children, take them with you. And take your pets too (if you can).
If you are going to a refuge or other accommodation that cannot take pets there is an organisation that will foster dogs.